Remembering Nana

Really been missing my nana a lot lately. I guess its because the holidays are approaching and she is not here for the first Christmas of my whole life. Its a little rough but I know she is here with me in spirit. It is also tough because she died before I graduated, and she really wanted to be there. She took me to my first day of Kindergarten. She was there for everything. I know she is watching over me now. She inspired me to be a special ed teacher from a very early age. She taught me that no matter how different people are, we love them just the same, because God made them very special. When I was little we used to talk to the ladies in her home who had special needs and she told me that I should love them even more =) she would also always tell me about her son Tommy who had downs syndrome. I never met him because he died before I was born. Her stories about him inspired me to become a special ed teacher. I loved him and felt like he was a part of my life. Nana died before I went to Winona, she passed away on Valentines day this year, but I know she is proud. Tommy's picture now sits on my desk at school. I will put it in my office someday as a constant reminder of why I started =). I wrote a poem for nana today and I would like to share it with you. Some of you may have seen it on Facebook, but I decided to share it here too. I hope you all have a blessed holiday, and remember all of the loved ones you have up in heaven with the Lord.

I wish Heaven had a phone,

So I could tell you to come home.

I miss you and I want to see you

To have you kiss my cheek

To have you hold me close

And to hear your soft voice speak

As the Holiday's approach,

They will not be the same,

but I will see you again,

when God calls my name. 


Almost a year you’ve been gone

It seems way too long

The memories that I have

Make it seem not so bad

The songs you used to sing

Still joy to me they bring

As I hear them in my head

I remember things you have said

You have taught me to grow

And for kindness to show

To everyone around me

For it will make them smile

You are missed by so many

And for those who didn’t know

I share your wonderful memories

Of how you helped me grow.

You made me who I am

By showing me the way

You taught me how to love

Everyone in every way

What a Week!

Wow seems like its been forever since I have entered in my blog, I have been so crazy busy!! It has definitely been non-stop since I have been home. I had my doctors appointment, which went fantastic, I won't say all that happened because all of you that read my blog have seen my Facebook. I will however post a link at the end of my blog if you want a better explanation of what I was diagnosed with. The article I found does a pretty good job of explaining it. Monday I had a CT scan of my chest, because 25% of people with MG have tumors on their thymus called Thymomas. They are usually benign, but can be cancerous. I am praying that I do not have that, otherwise they will need to crack open my chest bone to remove it. I should be getting the results here soon. Since Monday night I have been sick with the Flu. Last night between the hours of 7:30 ( when I went to bed because I couldn't stay awake) and 11:30, I woke up 14 times. I had super bad chills, and a 102.3 fever. Not fun. I am hoping that I am getting better, as I have been extremely weak. With MG its an overproduction of antibodies that attack your muscles, and when you are sick, your body has even more antibodies, so I am extremely weak. My poor mom who was up with me all night, had to help me just roll over. Between me being sick, and Ashley just getting her wisdom teeth out yesterday, my mom is how you would say very "frazzled." She's a trooper!

I have been praying a lot lately. Praising God for good news, and praying for no tumors on my chest. He is extremely faithful, and has a special plan for my life. I rely completely on him.

Thank you so much everyone for all of the kind words I have received, and thank you all for your
prayers!!

Here is a link explaining my new diagnosis

http://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Myasthenia_gravis?open#.TuLneWlt8Kw.facebook
Copy and paste in your search bar.


Kind of a long entry.
Love you All!!! <3

Short and Sweet

Today is officially my first day home for break, and what an adventure it has been. Tomorrow is my doctors appointment at 1:30 in the afternoon. Yes I am nervous but at the same time I am not. God already knows the results and he already has a plan for them. I am just giving it all completely to him. Finals went really well, I was proud of myself, and all of my studying paid off. 

I will update as soon as I find out more from the doctor. Love you all!! <3

Breaking Point

I was sitting on my bed tonight, studying for finals, and at approximately 11:00 I bursted into tears. I realized I was having a breakdown. Stress finally weighed in. I have had so much on my mind lately and I have been feeling like I am failing in things that I do, and I haven't been strong. I feel like I let myself down, but most importantly that I let God down. It took me a minute to realize that I really need to surrender everything to him and let him take care of it. It's way too much for someone to do on their own, and all to often I take on a lot more than I should. I feel like it was God's way of saying that he will take care of everything. I need to focus on my finals this week. I got a wonderful message today from a very sweet friend who said the exact same thing. That's exactly what I needed to hear, and it meant so much. I thank God for all of the blessings he has put in my life to get me through the hard times. I am trying hard not to think about next Friday. God already knows the results, and he already has a plan and has it under control. I can breathe easy in knowing that. God is our almighty savior and through him, all things are possible. My favorite bible verse is Phillipians 4:13 - I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength. 

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6. "

The Madness is Only Beginning

Well it is almost officially FINALS WEEK! Blah... Well I guess I gotta get used to it because after all, I am in college now. Its been extremely stressful trying to cram all of the information I have learned in the semester into this already overloaded brain. I just need to relax and know that God is on my side and he will never fail.
Another big stressor is coming up next Friday December 9th. The long awaited doctors appointment. I have spent many hours in prayer over next Friday, and I pray that my worry and anxiety will subside as it apporoaches. I know that God have everything under control, and I just need to trust him, and let him take care of it, as there is nothing I can do. Nothing except keep the faith of course =) I often find myself just thinking hmm... I wonder what I really was put on this earth to do? And then I remember that I may never know, and thats okay because as long as I fulfill my purpose according to God, it doesn't matter if I know or not.
It is with deepest sympathy that I send my thoughts and prayers to a friend of Nathan and I who graduated with us, and his wife Miranda on the loss of their son Gabrielle Barres-Perez. He was born into Heaven the day before Thanksgiving. May God bless them at this horrible time.

I am very blessed to be going home Wednesday after finals to be with my family =) I can not wait to see them and be with them as I will be thinking about Friday. It will take my mind off of things.
My sweet Nathan has been soo supportive and he is always here for me, and he has been absolutely wonderful. If you are reading this sweetie, I want to say thank you again for everything!!

God bless you all this week!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

God has really given me a lot to be thankful for this year. So many wonderful blessing, I couldn't possibly name them all =). My friends and family of course, but above all, having my sister Ashley here with us to celebrate. It was a rocky start to this year for my family, and its definitely been a tough one, but no matter where we are we have each other =) Happy Thanksgiving to all of my family up in Heaven, especially Nana =) You are joined with your husband, son, and sisters once again. Have a blessed day everyone!! Love you all =) and remember, I am thankful for YOU!!

Time to Be Thankful

It is almost my favorite time of year again!! Thanksgiving is just around the corner!!! I can hardly wait. I go home on Tuesday night =). On Thursday I am having Thanksgiving with dads family. I will get to see my grandparents, cousins, aunt and uncle, and the Paradise family as well!! There will be 18 of us under one roof!!  Then on Saturday I get to do it again with Marty's family!! I will get to see more cousins and grandparents and of course my wonderful step sister Tessa. I can not wait. I have soo much to be thankful for this year. The things I am most thankful for are my sister Ashley still being here with us(thats the biggest one), my supportive family, and being able to go to Winona and having an amazingly supportive boyfriend who is always here for me no matter what. I could go on and on about all of the things I am most thankful for, but that would be a mighty long post. I am very thankful for my faith in God. My faith has gotten me through all of my trials in life, and without it life would have no meaning. I am just overjoyed to be alive to celebrate another holiday season. We never know what tomorrow will bring, so we need to be thankful for here and now. We have almost made it through another year. 

I decided to post this now, because as it gets closer to Tuesday, my college life will become more crazy, as I have a lot of things to turn in before I can go home. 

I hope all of you have an amazing Thanksgiving, and beginning of the wonderful holiday season. Stay warm!! God Bless you <3

A lot going on

Hey everyone. Sorry it has been a few days, I have not been feeling so hot. Cold and Flu season is in full swing at Winona. I have been extremely weak lately, but that usually happens when I am sick. I felt a lot better today then yesterday. I had a 103.1 fever last night, but when I woke up this morning it had went way down. Not quite sure what was going on with that. I have been very stressed, but I have managed to keep up with everything, praise God for that. My close friends Courtney and Megan lost their grandpa this morning so please keep them in your prayers. I am looking to God a lot for strength this week, and thanking him for all he has provided me with, such as wonderful supportive people around me to pick me up when I am down. I have very special friends at Winona who I look up to and who are always here for me. I don't know what I would do without them. My friends Briana and Calli have been especially wonderful this week.
I am very much looking forward to going home for break. I miss my family very much. I will get to see my grandma from Iowa who I have not seen since before my uncle Darren died. It will be nice to see her. I will also get to spend some very special time with my sister Ashley that I am much looking forward to that very much, as she is so special to me. Well I hope everyone is avoiding getting sick and staying well as Thanksgiving is fast approaching!! Love you all, God bless <3

Blessed

Every time I come home I realize even more how blessed I am to be surrounded by all of my friends and family. The thing I love even more is that when I go back to Winona, I always feel the same way =) I feel loved wherever I go, and that is a blessing from God. Today is Veterans day, along with my Nana's 92nd birthday. It is a very special day. Tomorrow is Nathan's mom's birthday.  I couldn't possibly love her more if she were my own mom. I adore her. I got to spend some special time last night with my sister Ashley. She is amazing to me and I love her to pieces. It amazes me that I can actually see her faith growing. She is realizing that she has a very special purpose in life, and I am so blessed to be apart of her life, and that I was the one who was chosen to be her sister. She is a special gift to me, and I thank God every single day that she is still here. I am so unbelievably blessed by the God. The people he has put in my life, remind me every day of how special it is to be alive. Yes we all go through hard times, but God remains with us through them all. "I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength." - Phillipians 4:13 Have a blessed day and weekend everyone, and remember your veterans. Those in combat, retired, and the ones who lost their lives to defend our freedom.

Going Home!

This weekend I am very excited to be going home. It feels like it has been forever since I have been there. I have a lot of things I need to accomplish while at home this weekend. I will be very happy when I get to see my family and get to spend some much needed time with Nathan. I am going to surprise my cousins Billy and Braden (also my godchild) on Thursday. They have no idea that I am coming home, and I will be going with my dad to see them =) I cannot wait, I miss them soo much!! I love being home. It is also my second moms (Nathan's mom) birthday on saturday so I am looking forward to doing something special for her as well. God has really continued to bless me, as I have had more friends ask me about my faith and more people have continued to come to me for prayer. It is truly a blessing to me. I love when people can trust me with things, especially when they ask me to pray for them. I hope everyone is having a great week! Don't forget that Friday is Veterans day, so take time to be thankful for all of the soldiers now and those from the past. I will be thanking my daddy! I am so proud of him. Also on Friday it will be my Nana's first birthday up in Heaven. On 11-11-11 she will be 92 years old!! I miss her so much, but I know she is having a big party up there. I love you Nana. You taught me how to ride a bike, braid hair, and ever sing. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about you. You are there reason I am here in Winona pursuing my dream as a special ed teacher, in memory of your Tommy, all because at an early age you taught me that God made everyone special and that he loves all of us the same. Happy Birthday in Heaven to the most beautiful woman who ever lived. I love you Nana <3

Busy Week

It has definitely been a busy week!! But as always, a blessed one. I am so thankful for the ways God touches my life every single day. I am still blessed by meeting at least one new person each day. Since I have been at Winona, I think its safe to say that between church, my dorm, my classes and teachers, I have met at least 200 people. Praise God for that =). Last night the christian rock band Skillet came to campus. They gave an AMAZING concert!! There were 3000 people that attended. College students and people from the community. Of that 3000 that were there, 751 surrendered their lives to God for the very first time last night!!! SEVEN HUNDRED AND FIFTY!!!! That is so amazing! God is so good. His prescence was definitely felt in that gym.
Next weekend I am very blessed and will be able to go home =) it seems like it has been forever. I will get to spend some much needed time with my sweet Nathan, and of course my amazing family. I hope everyone has had an amazing week, full of many blessings. I pray that going into this next week you all find good health and much happiness coming your way! Try to stay healthy as cold and flu season is in full swing!! May God bless you this week! I love you all, and thank you so much for taking time to read my blog!! <3

Praising God

Well I made it through another week!! It was a rough one, but with strength from God and a little help from friends, I made it!! =) I love waking up every morning and realizing that I am where God wants me to be. I love the fact that I am on my way to helping people. It is so rewarding. I am also very blessed by the friends that surround me. I don't even make it out the door without at least 5 people making my day =) It's absolutely wonderful. I realized above all that in times of stress no matter how much or how little, that I have to turn it all over to God and just trust him. Sometimes it is easier said than done, but its so important. I yet again have been blessed this week. I have a friend who asked to come to church this week, and another one who called asking about God. It has been so incredibly wonderful to minister his love to them. I am very excited that on Thursday night, Skillet is coming to Winona. I pray that lives will be touched through this experience.
I am very excited to go home the weekend of the 11th. I will get to spend precious time with my sweet Nathan, my family, and my friends. I get to spend Friday with my precious Kendall bug, and I can not wait!! She is growing up so fast, and will be 15 months on November 2nd!! Where does the time go?! I am very blessed to have her in my life, and I couldn't imagine life without her.
This week will be another very busy busy week. I  have a lot of tests, and project deadlines. It will be okay though =)
I hope everyone has a wonderfully blessed week, and I pray that God touches your life in some way =)
much love to all of you!! <3

Intentionally Untitled

I dont really know what to talk about but I felt the need to blog, hence the title. Well it has been a busy, crazy, stressful, (insert any acronym that describes crazy to a high degree here) kind of week. These are the kind of weeks that I definitely feel the presence of God. I dread these weeks, but at the same time I feel closer to God so they balance out. I have had a LOT of my friends come to me with problems this week. I love nothing more than being there for them and helping them in any way I can, even if it is just listening to them. I pray a ton for all of my friends, especially the ones who are struggling. My stress level has been astronomical as midterms are coming to a close and registration is imminent. I just need to keep asking God for faith and strength to keep going. I have had wonderful support as always from my friends and family this week =). My RA's at school have been absolutely amazing!! The support I receive on a daily basis continues to blow me away. I adore them. Last night I was having a hard time so my RA came to see if I was doing okay and to give me a hug =) I love her. Today I was asked by a first grader I teach if I was a princess, and after responding no, he responded with, "well you should be." Made my entire day!! I just loved being blessed over and over again with amazing people in my life. I love my life, and there is not a single thing I would change about it. Not even the people I have lost, because they are in a better place in Heaven. Yes I miss them terribly, but I will see them when my job is done here on earth. I look at it as, we all started life together at the "starting line" and they just finished the race before I did and now they are just waiting at the "finish line" and waiting for me to finish my race. I love all of you so much and I pray that you are healthy and well. May God bless you this weekend. <3

Not a whole lot of words

This week has been extremely challenging as far as life goes. I have had a lot of things happen this week and I have had a few friends have a few horrible things happen to them as well such as death of a sister and a suicide in the family. It is so extremely hard to go through that. We don't always understand why God does the things he does, but we may never know. I just need to trust that he has a plan and that he loves me, and I know that. I love nothing more than being here for my friends and supporting them. I love when they come to me and ask for help. I feel like God works through me. I have again this week met a few more wonderful people. I just continue to be blessed. I loved all of the cards I have received in the mail this week, thank you everyone. A special thank you to my grandma Jan for the lovely phone call today, and yes I do think of you often =). I have an extremely busy week ahead of me, but I know that God is in control, and I am ready to face whatever comes along with it, because I know I am not alone. I hope you all have an amazing week and remember, God loves you and so do I!!!! <3

New Haircut

This picture is for my Grandma's =) I know that you guys don't go on Facebook as often. I got 5 inches chopped off of my hair and new layers. Mom did it of course. She always does such a great job. Never thought I would cut my hair this short, but I really like it.

Long Weekend Almost Over

Well I think that it is safe to say that this weekend was definitely a roller coaster ride. There were not many ups, as I spent a lot of time being a "pin cushion," but it was a very productive weekend. Hopefully I will be done with medical things for awhile. This weekend resulted in electric shocks, needles up and down my arms and legs, Needles in both arms for a total of 14 tubes of blood, 2 needles in my back, 1 to take out 5.5 viles of spinal fluid and one to inject my own blood back into my spine to form a clot to cover the hole that didn't close on its own, and an IV. I think its safe to say that I was a form of a pin cushion =). Yes it was a tough weekend, I would be lying if I said it wasn't, and yes I am EXTREMELY glad that its over. It was an amazing experience as well. I know some of you are asking yourselves, "how in the WOLRD could it be amazing?!" well it was in the sense that I had loved ones by my side the entire time. The doctors and nurses were so amazing, and of course Nathan never left my side. He was there for me through every second. He has been wonderful. So from that aspect of it, it was pretty amazing. I got to spend very valuable time with my family. Also during these times are when my faith is the strongest. I felt very close to God throughout this whole ordeal. God is faithful and he helped me get through it all. He gave me my amazing family to be there with me, and he gave wisdom to the doctors. Now as I continue to slowly heal, my faith remains strong and my family remains by my side. What more could I ask for?

Doing Well

Yesterday was an extremely long day, but after all of the electric shocks, needles in my arms and legs, needles, and a rod in my spine to collect 5.5 viles of fluid, and 5 tubes of blood from my arm, I am home and doing well!!! It was a long night, as I am extremely sore, but everything went very well. Now we just wait. The prayers and support I have received have been amazing. Nathan was so sweet, he was there through the entire thing, and he brought me flowers! What a sweetie pie. I will be going home to Winona tomorrow, and Ill be taking it slow as I did just have my spine exposed. It will be okay, I am looking forward to seeing everyone, even though it has only been two days. My sister is sitting next to me and she says hi to everyone. Much love to all of you, and thank you again for all of the prayers and support!!

Flowers from Nathan =)

Right after just getting home =) resting and doing well!!

I am Blessed

Everyday I am reminded of just how wonderful life is. God is amazing, and I love being in his beautiful creation. This morning as it is the morning of my appointments, I am nervous, but at the same time not really because God is with me and he will see me through. I just am putting all of my faith and trust in him. I am amazed and so truly blessed by all of the support I have. My friends and family have been so wonderful. Everyday, I have people that go above and beyond to let me know just how much I am loved. They are such blessings to my life. I am very much looking forward to going home this weekend, as I missed my family and my sweet Nathan!! I want to thank all of you who have sent me such encouraging words to help me through this. I really appreciate all of your prayers. A special thank you to Megan, Danielle,  and Briana. You guys are so insanely special to me. Thank you for always praying for me and being here for me. Also thank you to everyone at the EDGE. I love all of you!! I hope everyone has an amazing day! I am going now to spend some time in prayer <3

Long But Blessed Week

Well I am halfway through another long week. On Friday I will have my Spinal Tap. I am nervous, but I have faith in God that everything will be fine. I just need to trust in him, and surrender all of the things that are holding on to me, all of the worries that are consuming my thoughts. I have continued to be blessed. I feel like every single day I have an amazing Godly conversation with at least one person. I love it!! I continue to meet people all the time and they are all so special to me.
I have a really big test tomorrow so I need to get back to studying, but I like to keep updating because I know my grandmas and aunts and of course my mother like to know what I am doing. God is so good and he just keeps providing for me. I have been pretty weak this week, but I always find strength in the lord!!
I am soooo looking forward to going home this weekend!! I miss my family and my amazing Nathan!! =) <3. I am also getting a haircut on Saturday. I will be sure to post pictures!! I am planning on getting a lot chopped off. I know that you like my long hair grandma Jan, but it will grow back!! (I know you like when I put little comments in here so this ones for you!!)
Have a blessed rest of the week everyone!! Love you all so much, and thank you for taking time to read my blog!!! <3

God is Amazing!!!

Wow, what an amazing last few days it has been. The colors are changing and it has been beautiful outside. It makes me happy to be able to see these changes. God is amazing and he created a beautiful world. It's so sad how sin ruins that, but if you take a moment to reflect on that natural beauty of his creation, it is simply breathtaking. Tomorrow morning at 8am I get to have prayer time at church, since I joined the prayer team, and I am so exicted. I am on fire for God this week more than ever! It has been amazing. I have been truly blessed this week with such wonderful things. I continue to meet and become closer to more and more people who are such blessings to me and my life. I cherish all of the friendships I have already made since being here in Winona, and I keep them close to my heart. As I continue to meet more friends, I become that much more blessed. God has shown me amazing things. I met a friend this week who wants to become closer to God, and she asked to go to church with me. It was amazing. God is wonderful in so many ways. Everyday is such a gift, and I just LOVE living!! I get to experience little gifts each day just from seeing my friends, worshiping God, and simply being alive!! =) I hope and pray that you all are having a fantastic week. Also have a wonderful weekend as we are approaching Friday!!! Much love to all <3

Self-Defining Week

Wow, it's already October 1st!! Where has the time gone!! I have been in college a month and a half now, October 16th will be 2 months!! It has been crazy, but very fun. God has definitely shown me a lot of new things since I have been here. He has blessed me with so many new friends along the way. I look at each one of them as a gift. This week has been exceptionally hard, since I lost my step-uncle Darin. I have looked to my friends and God for strength. They have been amazing. I would not have made it through this week without them. I love my friends in my Teach21 cohort, and my friends in my dorm and from church. Each of them gives me something so special, and they help me look at life in a completely different perspective. I thank God for them over and over. This week I have met a few new friends that have already had a huge impact on me and my walk in faith. They are earthly angels to me. It has helped a lot to talk to people when I am stressed or having a hard day. God keeps giving me the strength to move on. Somedays I don's always have a lot, but somehow I make it. I thank those of you who have had late night talks with me this week. It means the world to me and I love you guys. I also thank my family for being so supportive in this new chapter in life. I love you guys. Thank you for all the calls, and notes of encouragement. It makes my day when I get notes in the mail from the ones I love so much. Also thank you to Nathan who has stood by me through thick and thin. It has not always been easy, but we always make it. You are amazing to me and I love you. This next week will be a very busy week, as I have a lot of deadlines to meet in terms of assignments. I know I can do it! =)
today I tore my closet apart and reorganized. It feels wonderful to have that all done. It was a process but I did it. Grandma Jan you would be proud of me because I have been keeping my room clean!!! I am not sure how I manage as  busy as I am, but I do =) Well it is a beautiful Fall day, and I have the windows open with a nice breeze, homework is all done so I think that means it's time for a little nap!! Love all of you guys, may God bless you this week and keep you well <3

New Definition of Busy

Boy if i thought I was busy before, that was nothing compared to now. College is nothing but BUSY!! Between studying, tests, church, homework, sleeping, and of course breathing, there is not much time for anything else!! Next week I will start my field experience. I will go into the classroom at St. Stans catholic school for girls. I have the 1st through 3rd graders on Thursday afternoons. I am very excited for that. I went to wolf ridge environmental learning center for school. We went rock climbing, we did a ropes course, we did hikes, we had nature walks, we did a stream study where we looked at creatures in the river, that was my favorite. I went on the first part of the ropes course. It was challenging as I was very weak that day. I did the first bridge. I was so proud of myself, and all of my friends were standing at the end cheering. I was so proud of myself I just couldnt contain my emotions. I couldnt believe I did it. I thank God for the strength he provided me to get through that, and for the wonderful supportive friends he gave me to help me along this new journey. My new friends are amazing. Every single one oof them are always so supportive and are always here for me. It has been amazing and God works in amazing ways. Tonight I have to take my first test online but I get to take it with a partner, so my new friend Sarinna is coming over and we are going to take it together, so I am happy about that, it should be fun!! Well as fun as a test can be I guess =). Well I better get back to studying, but I just wanted to give an update, as it has been a few days. 

On the ropes course at Wolf Ridge!!!

9/11

10 years ago today, I was sitting in my 3rd grade classroom, and listening to my teacher explain how there were bad people trying to hurt America. I remember going home that night being 8 years old and asking my mom if we were going to have a real live war with real live soldiers, and she said "yes honey, probably." That was when it hit me at 8 years old that something really big was happening. I also remember watching the TV with mom and dad and Bill Clinton came on and I said mommy he's not the president anymore, why is he talking? She explained that he was helping Mr. Bush. That night mom and dad went to the prayer service at church while we stayed with the neighbors. I still didn't understand the whole impact of what happened. I remember asking mom when she got home if bad people were going to come to our house. She said no because Jesus is protecting us, and if I was scared I should pray. She told me to pray for all the children who's mommies and daddy's died or had to go to war. I remember that night praying not only for them, but for the bad people and that they would know that Jesus loved them too.
As it is the 10 year memorial and I am 18 now, I obviously understand a lot more than I did at 8. Today Winona's concert choir put on the peace concert, which was really impactful. Then I went to church at 5, then at 7 I went to see the film United 93. That was the saddest movie I have ever seen. I cried so much after that. Everyone was crying. It was so sad. I watched on CNN the beautiful memorial fountain that opened up to the families of the victims. That was so powerful to see how beautiful that was, and that the families had a place to go and remember their loved ones. God is so good. I pray for the families of the victims, and I pray for peace and continued healing on them and this nation. We serve an amazing and powerful God who is capable of anything. God bless all of you and may you be well on this 10th anniversary of a wretched event.

A Familiar feel

Well I decided to go home this weekend. It feels amazing to be back. The saying Home is Where the Heart is, definitely stands true. I love being with my mom and family. I look forward to all of the times I get to come home here. Everyone has been so amazingly supportive to get me through. My Uncle Josh has also been amazing, and my grandparents. I love all of you so insanely much its crazy!!! I don't think I could love any of you more than I do now =) Mom is saying we might go to SC for Christmas, I would LOVE that!!!! I love being with my family. It was nice to see Nathan this weekend. Tomorrow I get to see my sister =) and maybe Billy and Braden. I love all of them. I cant wait till Christmas break when I get a whole month off!! Never realized how much I loved home, and my own bed, until I left it and it becomes a special treat and something I always look forward too!! Well thats all for now, i'm going to enjoy sleeping in my own bed =) I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday weekend!!!!

Battery=Running on Empty

Many people say that college takes a lot out of a person. I will be the first to attest to that!! I have been studying my rear end off!! I am so exhausted both physically and mentally. It is only 7:52, but as soon as I close my computer and take a shower, I am off to bed!! It seems like the days are getting longer. But thats because tomorrow is only Wednesday. But thats okay because on Monday, I don't have classes =) I have been trying to get as much sleep as my studies will allow. Right now that hasn't been a whole lot. I try to sneak a nap in here and there. I guess I just need to get used to this hustle and bustle of a life. I am hoping my mom will come see me this weekend =) she said she may so that's exciting!! I hope everyone has a safe and happy labor day weekend!! <3 you all!!!!

Another Busy week!!!

Well it's Monday again. I had a lovely weekend at home visiting with my family and Nathan's family (pretty much my family as well) :) so that was nice. It was weird coming back. I was so adjusted to being here and going home was weird but I started to get used to home again, so when I came back here it was really weird. Not exactly how I thought it was going to be. I had a few tears as I left home again. Not as many as the first time though. Today was an extremely long day, as last night I was up late studying. It was hard to wake up today, and by 1:00 I was fighting to stay awake. I made it though!!!! I wish I could say early to bed tonight, but I have a lot of homework to do. This week is very busy in terms of due dates, and things I need to get done. I often am reminded by the work load, that this is not high school anymore!! But that's okay =) its just going to take some adapting. Well thats about it for tonight, as I need to start my reading in my textbook. Seems like all I do nowadays. But anyway, I hope everyone has had a wonderful Monday, and I wish everyone and amazing week!! Love you all and thanks for reading my blog!! If you were here, say hi so I know you stopped by =)

<3 always,
Alyssa

It's Just Beginning

Well today is my 3rd day of classes. Everything is going extremely well. I have had a lot of homework, but that is to be expected in college. I still continue to meet wonderful people. I am so excited tomorrow for my first night of bible study. I love the EDGE church and everyone that I have met from there. I will be very happy to see my family and Nathan this weekend. It's been a week but feels like a month. I can not wait to see them. I miss my sister terribly as well and I think of her often. I really like all of the girls in my dorm. Everyone is so nice and it's always fun to see everyone before and after classes. People always stop in and say hi, which is fun. Nathan and I have been on Skype a lot which is amazing! I love being able to see him. He started classes the same day I did so we get to compare =) I have been gettting a lot of inspritaitonal cards from my family, which help a lot. I love getting mail =) I got a care package from my family =) they are the best. I LOVE THEM!!! I cant wait to see everyone next time I come home. I have learned to take one day at a time and be thankful for each day as a new gift. I trust in God to be my guide. I rely on him, as he has a plan for my life and my future. I just leave it up to him and trust in him, which gets me through. Well thats all for now, I am off to my children's literature class =) I hope everyone has a great day!!

Keeping the Faith

Well, I almost made it through my first whole week at Winona. Classes haven't officially started, but they will Monday. Not gonna lie, I am a little nervous!! I have been getting cards and letters in the mall and I LOVE IT!! thank you to everyone who has sent me something. My entire day is made when I open the mailbox and see something addressed to me. I have met so many wonderful people here. It is so nice to know that everyone is so helpful and supportive. I have enjoyed sincerely meeting everyone that I have this week. Everyone is amazing. God put me here for a reason and he put the people I have met here for a reason as well. I cant wait to see what happens in the coming months as God uses me in ways I can't even fathom. I put all my faith in the Lord and allow him to guide me. Tomorrow night at 6 i will go to church at the EDGE with my amazing friend sami. She has helped me so much and is amazingly supportive. Sometimes I swear we are the person. I am extremely blessed to have all the people in my life that I do. God works is amazing ways and he has a plan for me. It may not be the same plan I have, but I trust in him to be my guide. I just have faith and each day is a new day.

Scooter

I am so happy I got my scooter today. I think it will help a lot, as I am tired of falling down. Its a little big and bulky, especially getting around corners, and the elevators are very small so I need to be careful. I dont wanna run over anyones bare tootsies especially since everyones wearing flip flops. I hope it will help tomorrow having the scooter. I am excited to be able to get around =)

Response to Comments

I really want to thank my friends and family for following my blog, and being so supportive. It means the world to me knowing that you guys are behind me 100%. I know I can do it, it's just going to take a little time to adjust. I really do believe that I am meant to be here. God has a plan for me, and I will carry out his plan. He put me on this earth to be successful. I love each and every one of you more than words. Thank you for commenting uncle Josh and grandma and grandpa. You guys are the nest family anyone could hope to have. And thank you lastly to Nathan, as you are my number one supporter and are behind me completely. It means the world knowing that you understand what I'm going through and being there for me. Tomorrow we have a picnic lunch and a course called "Beer, Booze, and Books" should be interesting. Today I met the people in my teaching program. They are so nice. I cant wait to get to know them all more. There are only 2 boys in a class of 30!!!!! I'm sure they love it!!! They are super annoying but I don't pay attention to them.  I start each day with God and lean on him and trust him. I also just live by the "each day is a new day"

Getting Adjusted

Well I am here and all moved in. I had dinner with my floor of my residence hall. It was fun, and I met some nice people. My anxiety level is still extremely high. I met my RA and she's really nice. She's super supportive. Everyone here has been so welcoming. Tomorrow orientation starts at 9am. We are going to have tours and more meetings. Tonight they are showing a movie for everyone on campus for everyone. I am still very nervous. It's been fun so far but a little weird.

Scary Steps

Tonight as I am sitting on my bed writing my first entry, I have tons of mixed emotions. I am so sad too be leaving the life I have known for 18 years behind, but at the same time so excited for the next step in the future. The hardest part was saying goodbye to my family and my sweet Nathan. I know it's not goodbye forever, but that still doesn't make it any easier. Tomorrow I will leave my house at 9 am and officially leave my childhood behind. I have orientation from tomorrow, until Friday. Then on Monday the 22nd, classes officially begin.
I am excited to move in with my room mate Leah, who I have known since 9th grade. It will be an experience for both of us =). I am so sad that this will be the last night in my bed, and knowing this is the last time I will permanently be living at home. This is extremely bittersweet, as if I can almost see my entire life right in front of me. God is my guide, and I will lean on him through the hard times, and praise him and rejoice through the good. I love all of my friends and family so much, and I want to thank all of you for your love and support. It means so much to me. I will try to keep updated as much as possible, but I of course will be studying. Well i'm off to bed because I leave early tomorrow. I will update sometime later this week to let everyone know how my new life is going. Until then.. =)